Parenting is a beautiful journey of fostering, guiding, and supporting children as they grow, learn, and discover their journeys and purposes. Witnessing their growth and prosperity is a source of immense pride and a deeply fulfilling experience, a testament to the effort and love poured into their upbringing.

Parents’ expectations of their children as they grow up often revolve around their hopes for their well-being, development, and future success. However, the expectations should be realistic and achievable. They should be more supportive, non-coercive, flexible, and adaptable. Parents should put in the effort without slogging through the results. A broader scope and balance between apt guidance and space and freedom should exist.

Parenting is not just an experience; it’s a unique journey each parent undertakes.

There are no parenting rules or guidelines, making it challenging and daunting. But remember, you’re not alone in this journey.

Pigeon eggs hatch into ugly-looking babies in unpleasant nests stationed in attics. The babies grow feathers and quickly start pouncing on their first flights. The parent’s role in nurturing the eggs and babies ends here. The semi-adult birds are left alone for the rest of their lives – with their parents nowhere to be seen. Most animals endure the same course of parenting and development.

Yet, the human experience of parenting is not just exceptional; it’s unparalleled. It spans generations, with the emotional, mental, physical, and financial challenges of raising a child, whether by ‘choice’ or ‘compulsion’, culminating in a unique finale.

Parenthood should never be questioned for its validity and status. This isn’t Perfect Parenting—it should be ‘just the real one.’ Time has, however, altered its gist and essence, giving it new dimensions.

Parenting is about more than just providing the basics. It’s about taking a seat in life’s stadium, cheering on the YOUNG TURKS (a young person eager for radical change to the established order) as they play the game of their lives, guided by their instincts and logic. The parent’s role is to be a supportive spectator, encouraging authoritative, mature, youthful, courageous, and hardworking children.

Giving them space is crucial; not interfering with their strategy without being asked or consulted is vital. Praise them wholeheartedly for their wins and comfort them in their failures.

Trusting their instincts and ideals, parents shouldn’t foster unfulfilled dreams in their children. This mundane process compromises the family’s happiness by losing precious time during unnecessary arguments.

Parenting begins with a child’s first cry. The greatest challenge, however, is learning to let your heart run outside your body. In this process, parents understand and evaluate life’s intricacies, strengths, and acumen, and they acquire the courage to deal with their fears and apprehensions. It’s crucial to maintain a balance and not let daily events and ailments drain you. You’re probably not doing your job correctly if you’re not tired.

A child constantly observes and learns from their parent’s behaviour and attitude towards them and each other. As the saying goes, ‘Loving couples raise affectionate children’—children learn more from who you are than from what you teach.

RUMI said –“Raise your words, not your voice. It is the rain that grows flowers, not thunder.

Whether a valid reason, caution, or a lesson, hitting teaches a child that the hitting parent isn’t safe. Avoid getting irritated with children messing around on the premises—pardon them. They are making innocent memories for you—you will embrace the stuffed toys, feel the jargon markings on the walls, and cry for them the day they are gone.

Parents don’t gain ownership of their children by merely sharing their genetic material and raising them. They have to prepare a child for a path, not a path for a child.

BRIAN WEISS says, — “Your children are souls who have opted for the zygote of your ovum and sperm to come into this world. They are on a journey by their natural selection. As a parent, you are simply the provider, not the master of their lives and destiny. Children will pave their way through learning and intellect. They are life itself, wanting to express themselves. It is certainly not our toil to toughen the children to face the ruthless world – let’s raise them by infusing morals to make the world a little less cruel and heartless place to live in.”

Free and meaningful parental communication makes a child’s mind feel wise and adorable because they believe in becoming one. Let them feel loved—love provides the cushion to fall back, feel safe, and have the strength and courage to face the world and do things for themselves to succeed.

There is a flip side to good parenting —

Parents may not be the owners, but they are the sacred temple churning out a life. They deserve respect, emotional reverence, physical veneration, and care as they age and suffer. They should defend their self-respect without succumbing to an emotional dependence on the nurtured generation that is their own. It is crucial for them to feel valued and respected throughout their journey.

Parents should know when to detach emotionally, remain silent, and not interfere in their children’s affairs — love them, but don’t stress or get caught up in their drama.

“Parenting is hard, especially trying to be PATIENT with little versions of IMPATIENT you.”

 

My favourite quote on parenthood —

“Always kiss your children goodnight, even if they’re already asleep.” H. JACKSON BROWN, JR.

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