BEING A BLACK SHEEP – Good or Bad?

A person seen differently as an outsider who doesn’t adapt to the potentials or norms in society or family is called a Black Sheep. The term carries a negative implication, suggesting the person is embarrassed and disapproved.

However, being a black sheep can also imply distinctiveness, individuality and resistance to conventionality. Should we call such a person the odd one out? There is a profound self-awareness appraisal and strength from embracing one’s uniqueness.

Can we relate to the idea of being a black sheep?

Everyone wants to stand out in the crowd. Life is about social recognition, basking at the top and caressing the pinnacles. We compare ourselves to the people on top and create pedestals to scale. The endeavour can be routine or something different from the general notion.

Are we prepared to accept the mundane rat race or become someone special – a Black Sheep?

So, what if the black sheep stands out amongst the hundreds of sheep with a white fleece? Why is being the black sheep considered downgrading and abusive?

Black sheep is an idiom used to designate a group or family member distinct from the rest of the population.

The black fleece sheep suffered this abuse because their wool was considered less valuable and could not be dyed, unlike the white fleece sheep. In psychology, the ‘Black Sheep Effect’ refers to the tendency of group members to judge likeable ingroup members more positively and deviant ingroup members more negatively.

“I may be the family’s black sheep, but some white sheep aren’t as white as they try to appear.”

We live in a claustrophobic crowd of hypocrites who consider their ideals the day’s calling and social norms. Anyone going against their set norms is viewed as an outcast, rebellious, wrong or weird – The Black Sheep.

“It takes nothing to join the crowd – it takes everything to stand alone.”

The fact is that the so-called white-collared people or ‘White sheep’ are the greatest liars. Most are unreliable and can stab in the back. Their speeches and promises carry no meaning or weight, and they are fragile with frivolous characters. Stains and dirt quickly show on them, no matter how hard they try to conceal them.

The black colour is original, with no stain, no change and no overpowering. Someone has rightly quoted – ‘Black is modest and arrogant at the same time. Black is lazy, easy, and mysterious. But above all, Black says – ‘I Don’t bother you—don’t bother me.’

History shows that the people who thwarted ordinary principles and kicked the backs of idealistic people, who preached to them the way of life, rose to unparalleled plinths, creating priceless pedestals that changed the façade of society and the world. They were the Black Sheep who refused to fit into the wrong herd, finding another Black Sheep to hang out with.

All the prodigious scientists, explorers, artists, and even top politicians were considered the Black Sheep. They were laughed at as eccentrics and ostracised from society. They, however, believed in themselves and rose against all odds, slapping the community in the face and emerged victorious.

Galileo Galilei, the “Father of science” and the most wondrous Italian physicist, astronomer and philosopher, was laughed over for being a crazy man. He was the Black Sheep, eventually proving his critics wrong and emerged as the most illustrious astronomer ever.

In the Ramayana, Vibhishana is the family’s Black Sheep. He lived beyond the norms and was responsible for the invincible Ravana’s final downfall and destruction. He is considered virtuous in Hindu mythology because he helped the deity, Rama, get back his beloved wife, Sita.

It is not embarrassing but a compliment to be called a black sheep. Some of history’s most famous families have had scandalous sons or daughters who did weird things that originated in their overactive minds, like posing naked for famous statues. They even cracked shady deals while in the business. In a toxic family system – the black sheep is often just the person who sees through everyone else’s bullshit.

“I like weird people – the black sheep, the odd ducks, the eccentricities, the loners, the lost and forgotten. More often than not, these people have the most beautiful souls.” UNKNOWN.

A ‘Black Sheep’ will –

*Refuse to withdraw when it can live.

*Refuse to follow where it can lead.

* Seek and hold its true purpose.

* Live life on its terms and rules.

* Leave footprints that change the world.

* Leave fingerprints that change history.

* Trust its internal compass and live life with courage and zest.

*Become a self-healer.

*Break the generational curses, guilt, and shame and start a new lineage.

Are people born as Black Sheep? NO! — Nasty parenting, sibling rivalries, and societal conflicts turn people astray and later brand Black Sheep. Parents who enforce ideals and force-feed their dreams onto their children eventually lose them. Parents must nurture them to become better humans and support and encourage them to become the best –THEM, not the mediocre YOU.

It takes a mountain of courage and an ocean of enthusiasm to traverse a unique path. Try reading your child’s forehead and respecting his manifestations and emotions; don’t panic if he thinks differently. You never know what an overactive and intelligent mind is cooking. He may be planning to build a bridge across the Pacific or trying to create a ladder to reach the Moon.

“The Black Sheep is usually the only one telling the truth.”

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