Every day, we carry the burden of what we need to unlearn. But imagine the relief, the lightness that comes with letting go of the weight of negativity that drags us down. To soar, we must first rid ourselves of these heavy chains. Life is a journey of unlearning what is untrue and false, and it’s a journey that brings a sense of freedom and relief. As the saying goes, ‘Half of wisdom comes from learning what to unlearn’.
The human mind is conditioned and often fails to comprehend the infinite. The logic and learning involve unlearning what is being learnt. The spiritual journey is a courageous call to unlearn fear and bravely accept love as a lasting impression. Love is the key to unlearning who you have been taught to be, and it is always there to guide you back to yourself.
The power of unlearning is not to be underestimated; it is profound and liberating. It has the unique power to free us from old and stale patterns, outdated beliefs, taboos, and habits, empowering us to create our own paths, shaping our thinking and behaviour. Unlearning is not just about letting go; it’s about taking control of our own lives and becoming self-reliant.
Just as we stuff our attics and cupboards, our minds are also forced to retain too much knowledge, emotions, and information. Retaining all that stuff for over years is not wisdom. We are in the habit of accumulating assumptions, cultural conditioning, and habits that once served and nurtured our psyche. True wisdom often comes from letting go of what created a hostile milieu and no longer serves us well.
Unlearning helps us break and limit our belief system. It allows us to question and challenge the beliefs we’ve held onto, even if they were once considered absolute truths. Over time, we have outgrown several scientific, emotional, and societal truths that were once accepted as absolute – such as the Earth being flat and the Sun revolving around it. With time, we loosened our chains, allowing our learning process to evolve. This evolution negated and unlearned past philosophy, creating new literature and a positive belief system.
Unlearning has practical applications in various aspects of our lives, from the workplace to our personal relationships. It’s about breaking free from the notion of ‘This is how it’s always been and will continue to be.’ Instead, it’s about embracing the idea of ‘Well, this is how it can be now.’ For instance, in a work setting, unlearning could mean challenging the traditional hierarchy and embracing a more collaborative approach. In relationships, it could mean unlearning toxic patterns and embracing healthier communication patterns. This process of unlearning has led to the creation of new prose, new ways of thinking, and a more positive, inclusive, and open belief system.
True wisdom doesn’t come through clinging to the treatises and discourses or running after self-styled Gurus. Actual knowledge germinates when settled dictums and theories are challenged and questioned. In other words, by unlearning what has been said and making fresh impressions through one’s own efforts and experimentation, genuine wisdom is cultivated. A breakthrough occurs by acquiring new information, unlearning traditional, outdated methods, and daring to visualise facts differently.
A surgeon performs surgeries, benefiting the patients. But an extraordinary surgeon tackles complications well and emerges jubilant. His wisdom is not entirely based on pre-recorded, pre-established manoeuvres and procedures, but rather on his own experience, in which he unlearns previous notions and books and creates his own methods to navigate difficult situations.
It’s a challenge to unlearn and requires practice and dexterity – SUGGESTIONS TO DO IT–
*Question your beliefs – “Why do I always follow what people tell me or have documented?”— “Is it the proven truth that I should follow, or should I develop my own notions and predicaments?” Questioning oneself opens the door to unlearning and infuses a fresh air of learning.
*Confront your presumptions and notions – Living through the burdens of our own assumptions, we develop negativity that hampers growth. Why do we nurture the instinct that— “I can’t handle financial matters”—”I am bad at maths”— “I can’t perform on stage,” etc. We have to infuse encouragement and fresh adulation.
*Boost your behavioural patterns – The art of ‘Letting go’ of situations, relationships, schedules, and people’s behaviours is the best part of unlearning. How about quitting getting angry while driving? Or, changing the boring roster to a congenial one, or, ignoring the irritating neighbour and stopping reacting to his stupid remarks.
*Challenge your wisdom – Replace the thought of ‘knowing something’ with ‘curiosity to know more’ or question your knowledge. “I think I know about this situation—but, what if I don’t really know?”
Unlearning plays a more profound role in Romantic relationships and friendships-
They say it takes six months to unlearn a toxic and stale romantic relationship. The art of letting go of limiting beliefs for a healthier and more positive life is key to happiness.
The meaningful and loving relationships we form in our adult lives are deeply connected to our childhood patterns, observations, and learnings. The childhood insecurities and fears arising out of toxic parenthood, nasty situations, and abuse teach naïve minds to form firm foundations of defective learning and understanding.
Unlearning involves actively questioning ingrained ideas and freeing oneself from outdated notions, thereby opening doors to more authentic intimacy. For instance, unlearning in a relationship could mean challenging the belief that one partner should always be dominant and the other submissive, and instead embracing a more equal and respectful dynamic. It could also mean unlearning the idea that friendships should be based on convenience and instead valuing genuine connection and mutual respect.
Modern times and the present generation have come out of age-old concepts and unlearned –
“Love should be effortless, and it can never die”.
“I must keep fighting for love—no matter what”
“My ‘Pati’ is ‘Pati Parmeshwar.’
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Thanks for such a beautiful write up . I am already trying to unlearn this so that I understand everything better.
Jeete Raho , likhte raho
Thank you so much sir. Thanks a lot for your blessings and appreciation.
Love you.. will see you soon.
regards
Dear doctor Anuj
Read with profound interest a very touchy subject on unlearning.
Who but you would have shared immense knowledge on this. Whilst everyone is striving to LEARN, we have also to UNLEARN.
Kudos!!!!
Thanks a lot dear for the appreciation. Yes, i am in the process of unlearning so much that has cluttered in all these years. Not an easy job.. but possible.
regards
So true. Beautifully presented.
Thanks a lot dost.
Dear Anuj
Really a very touchy elaboration of unlearning . Keep writing
God Bless you
Dr anup khare
Thank you so much sir. I am so happy that you read my blogs.
regards
Read it all. Have been trying to practice unlearning but have not taken it seriously but,yes ,I need to apply it more seriously now. Thanks for a timely reminder through this write-up .
Thank you so much bro for the appreciation. I have been myself, trying to practice UNLEARNING. It gives a good mental boost and emotional relaxation.
Regards
The blog “Power of Unlearning-Unlearn to grow” is scripted logically and coherently on the subject matter.. It is rightly said, life is a journey of unlearning what is untrue and false.. Since childhood we are brought up in an atmosphere of laid-down ideology and principles and the notion goes as we grow older.. Rarely, we perceive the other side of the coin. Like a scenario in front of us may take a topsy- tervy turn , ithe moment we intend to unlearn the other side of the coin. Our false notion regarding an individual or an object is so deeply rooted and etched in our mind that, seldom, we try to unravel it.. You have wonderfully cited an example of a surgeon performing a surgery.. We are encapsulated in an envelope of a stereotype guidelines and information and we never intend to move on from conventional dogmas and pathways.. Our aim should be to find out unexplored aspects with an open mind. First and foremost approach is to forget all misdeeds committed either by self or a a near and dear one.. This will lead to unlearn new space in the said relationship.. Abundance of love will start flowing and it will make relationship more stronger and lasting.. Unlearning tend to enhance learning of new horizons and concept.. Too good Dr Anuj…
Hello,
I really like your line– Our aim should be to find out unexplored aspects with an open mind, forgetting our misdeeds.
We think but do we utilize things in our lives?
Thanks for your feedback.
regards