Life plays salsa with the Good and Bad times. We understand that these are phases and we can’t have one thing. They take turns. No matter what we try and do, the phases keep coming and going at regular intervals. At times it leaves us wondering: “Is it only me who is suffering?”
We usually refrain from the “Why Me?” cult, when we are happy.
When we are suffering, the entire world seems to have stopped, and the universe has focused all its miseries on our peaceful and solemn home.
It’s about BEHAVIOUR and MANAGEMENT.
How do we behave when the times are good? Have we become careless and complacent? Does flamboyance take over, and we take things in stride with a superfluous attitude?
How do we manage when times are bad? Do we fumble and falter when depressed and develop suicidal tendencies?
A Senior Consultant used to say, “You are a competent Surgeon not by the efficiency with which you perform great surgeries; it’s the art, dexterity and approach with which you manage and handle a major complication during a surgical procedure that makes you a Great Surgeon.”
The pattern of Behaviour and Management holds well even when we are dealing with relationships.
Do we behave well when things are hunky-dory?
Do we manage well with a broken heart or a strained friendship?
“Never mix bad words with bad moods. You will have many opportunities to change your mood, but you will never get the chance to replace the words you spoke.”
Time makes us meet people. Our hearts decide who we want in our lives, but it’s the BEHAVIOUR that decides who stays for long periods of time. In one shallow move, the castle of a long and empathetic friendship may crumble for good. A state of NO RETURN.
The human mind is good at giving second and third chances in worldly affairs. But where relationships are concerned, we do not pardon mistakes and blunders. We become judgemental. Don’t we?
Remember the famous couplet by Rahim that read, “Rahiman Dhaga Prem Ka, Mat Todo Chatkaay: Toote Par Fir Na Jude, Jude Gaanth Pad Jaaye”.
However, the true mark of maturity is when somebody hurts you, and you try to understand the situation from their point of view instead of trying to hurt them back.
DALAI LAMA puts it another way, “Do not let the behaviour of others destroy your inner peace.”
The acid test is to MANAGE when the times are bad and unfavourable.
The worst possible scenario the world is going through a COVID.
What Will Behaviour do when nothing is going well?
Present times have shown us that life is nothing but a mere gamble at the hands of the ruthless Nature. We insult Nature, and it retorts by hitting us deep in the belly.
No matter how nicely or poorly we have behaved in life, the hour is to prove our gusto by showing how we manage these awful times.
When there is Emotional, Physical and Financial bashing: We remember the lessons of Moral science that we studied as kids.
“You may delay, but the time will not. A plan is what; a schedule is where. It takes both a plan and a program to get things done. A man who dares to waste one hour of life has not discovered the value of life.”
“It’s not enough to be busy. The question is: what are we busy about?” HENRY DAVID THOREAU
Every person has a predicament and an attitude towards tackling problems in life. Several of the preaching and teachings have been broadcast through various media channels, but eventually, it is what our minds understand. We may listen to sermons all throughout the day, but in the evenings, we perform acts that our awareness and heart suggests.
We waste time managing and maintaining mundane jobs and relationships. In this arduous and meaningless process, we forget what the goal really was. Our Management falters, and we succumb to depression and misery.
“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or objects.” ALBERT EINSTEIN.
There are so many things that are IMPORTANT in life. Some are URGENT. But the irony is that we spend our resources and energy on things that we think are Urgent. In the process, important things take a back seat. Then one fine evening sitting in the corner of the house in the twilight years of our lives, we think about how much was left undone.
This is truly poor management.
Life is a composite of Behaviour and Management. The person who maintains decent relationships with proper Supervision of time and resources wins the race.
“The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.” ABRAHAM LINCOLN.
So, behave well today, and manage the problems well … the future will take care of itself.