Life & Love,Relationships

How to safegaurd your self-respect? WHY TO ‘CHASE’ SOMEONE – WHEN YOU ARE THE ‘CATCH’.

Why should you chase someone? Is it a pursuit of monetary gains, societal status, or emotional gratitude in a relationship? What if the chase culminates in compromising your self-respect? Rather be the catch or the prime cut. Let yourself be the flag holder with magnified self-esteem.

We depend upon people, situations, and relationships throughout our lives. Dependence is a natural phenomenon and no life can survive alone without help. The truth is that we depend on ourselves—our health, our intellect, and our emotions to carry on with a stable and decent life.

The problem starts when Dependence becomes a Weakness. Isn’t it like popping in a sleeping pill each night for a desperate sleep or a compulsive shot of vodka before a stage performance?

Someone rightly quoted that – “Happiness eludes you when you ‘chase’ it: However, it ‘catches’ you when you least expect it.”

Don’t ever make goals while looking at the horizon. Chase the destination that your rational geography and your emotional intentions can resolve. This holds good while picking up relationships and loving alliances. Teach people how to treat you by deciding your preferences. When you start loving yourself enough, you set boundaries. Your time and energy are precious and you have to make the right choices as to how you use it.

While stashing your wallet with green bills and a plastic card, store a little Attitude in your pocket. Use it when you see your self-respect molested by the people around you. Make it a tool for self-defense rather than a weapon to inflict injury.

SOLITUDE makes one stronger and less gullible by infusing the elixir to lead a dignified fulfilling life. LONELINESS fetches susceptibility to dependence and false expectations from people that may necessitate sacrificing self-respect.

When I chased relationships, they exploited me and lynched me. The day I gifted them my absence and walked away from their deceptive precipice, a deep sense of cheerfulness conquered me and energized me. Why should you behold an alliance that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you joyful? Remember, your self-respect is something you give away for whatever reason. No one dares to take it away if you refrain from not giving it to them.

I prefer to live with a self-value of self-respect rather than the false assurance of an Ego.

“Don’t put yourself down just to avoid criticism, to please others, or to slow your kindness. The world needs light, not mediocrity.” PAULO COELHO.

Remember the childhood role of Amitabh Bachchan in the movie ‘Deewar’ when he refuses to pick a coin that was thrown at him for his boot polish service? Self-respect has no age bar. It is not a commodity for rich, successful, and senior chauvinistic males. No one has the right to play with it. ‘You, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.’


How do I guard my self-respect?

*Be the sentinel of yourself – The most loved person in the world, the Mother can be a physical protector of her child, but the child has to acquire and guard his identity and his esteem, himself. Be soft like the juicy kernel from the inside, but fortify your outer shell with a hard wall of self-respect and attitude. No trespassing, please.


*Be dedicated to yourself. – The way you treat yourself, sets ethics and behavioral morals for others on how you claim to be treated. You must sweat to develop a strong self-image while formulating your path to triumph in life. Your success is determined by your poise, courage, and love of yourself. Speak to yourself each morning – “I am the best.”

‘Respect yourself and others will respect you’—CONFUCIUS.


*Be the one to walk away. – Don’t waste words and energy on people who deserve your silence. The most powerful thing you can utter at times is nothing. For you to understand and acknowledge your self-worth, you need to step outside of some people and situations. When people raise RED pennants, show them your WHITE flag and call it peace. It’s for your benefit, not theirs. Live with your self-respect as your priority, not as an option.


*Be bold to overpower your past. – Your past, be it good or bad, tends to pull you down. For whatever reason, don’t bestow your past to define your future. Those who chase their past out of their vulnerability and ambiguity turn blind to the brilliant colors of the present and regrettably ruin their future as well.


*Be courageous and motivated by your passions. – You barely survive the mundane atrocities of life if you fail to comprehend and energize your passions. Living with passion is the true meaning of existence as it fosters not only your body but your soul too. The day you chase your passions you understand that you are the ‘catch’ and the whole world is envisaging being in your shoes with reverence.


“Be dedicated to yourself so much that God asks you to quote your desires before scribbling down your destiny.” . . . ‘Khudi Ko Kar Buland Itna…..’

Remember, we have the power to write our destiny but are not aware of it. By uplifting and raising ourselves, we become aware. That’s the true essence of life.













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  1. Dr Ashok Kumar Ojha says:

    The blog ” How to safe guard your self respect? Why to chase someone when you are the catch ” reminds me of legendary Ghalib sher “खुदी को कर बुलंद इतना कि हर तक़दीर से पहले। खुदा बंदे से गर पूछे बता तेरी रज़ा क्या है aptly fits into zist of your view point.. Similarly राष्ट्र कवि श्री मैथली शरण गुप्त द्वारा रचित कविता ” जिस को न निज गौरव तथा निज देश का अभिमान है। वह नर नहीं पशु निशा चर और मृतक समान है vehemently describes genisis of self respect.. A pauper, at times, refuses to take help.He would rather prefer to earn his livelihood by doing work. Self esteem is an inherent trait which is not visible from outside.. It pops up when situation turns hostile and one refuses to cowdown. If self respect is lost, every thing is lost. Too good Anuj..

    1. Dr. Anuj says:

      Very rightly said — if self-respect is lost, everything is lost. This has been our teaching since our childhood days. We earn self esteem by our perceptions and behaviour.
      Thanks for the valuable input bhai.

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