Life & Love,Relationships,Uncategorised


When we think and yearn for something positive to happen, we indeed behold a negative thought by nurturing a farce expectation. Because positivity might elude us by giving us stress and yielding a negative experience. If we accept negativity gracefully, we become positive in our approach. There is affirmation and the zest to combat an adverse scenario.


The worst thing is expecting Heaven in a Love relationship. The journey is arduous and full of misgivings, jilt, and emotional exploitation. Picture-perfect love life is a far-fetched thought. The hunky-dory days of dating, leading to life-long commitments, soon nose dive, and what is left is the aftermath of compromise, adjustment, and guilt. The need for a positive experience eventually ends in a negative experience.

Suppose expectations are forced into the back seat at the beginning of a relationship, not as a negative approach but as a transparent emotion. In that case, the alliance prospers and blooms with an exceptional fragrance, providing positivity.

Abhinav was suffering from acute pain in his lower back. The chances were of a backbone malignancy. He went through several specialist consultations and references. He even accessed some top astrologers and soothsayers. His sleep was severely affected, and his moods were ruined. The whole family was suffering because of Abhinav’s irritation and anguish. There was a lurking fear of the unknown. Abhinav envisaged a positive assurance from the doctors, but in reality, this led to negativity and unfathomable pessimism.

Abhinav was eventually referred to a reputed metropolitan corporate hospital and was diagnosed with Malignancy. To my utmost surprise, something drastic and dramatic happened. Abhinav accepted the truth gracefully and developed a positive attitude towards his problem in the coming days. He underwent proper treatment subsequently and is now well and truly hearty. The catch was that Abhinav accepted the negativity gracefully and nurtured a positive approach.

Is it like searching for a hidden snake in the closet with fear and uncertainty? Then bravely facing the reptile when it is found sitting on the table and slays it with a stick.

Sometimes we have to experience the nastiest things in our lives. In the process, we learn to rejuvenate and appreciate the good things that affect us. Don’t we enjoy a warm day after an agonising cold spell? How about renouncing our slip-ups and relieving our thought processes? The best approach is to undermine these mistakes and use them as stepping stones. If it’s good- it’s stupendous: if it’s terrible – it’s an experience. No regrets!

TIM FARGO says, “Great experiences are built on a foundation of bad experiences.”

Humans have an immoral tendency to reminisce and falsely cherish bad experiences more vividly — thus, nurturing the consequential negative impact on their lives. Why do we exhume negativity that we buried long ago with the help of our intellect and mutual pardon?

‘Throw away the bad experience, but save the lesson.’

‘Blame Game’ is a menace for everyone. A negative person starts blaming others. The most accessible buy is to offload the burden of self-defeat, deceit, and dishonesty on another person by blaming it on him. It is like throwing your mental and emotional garbage into a neighbour’s trash can. The evil and sad part is that the person envisages positivity by doing this. Does it help?

Searching for positivity is, again, a negative thought. By blaming someone, we become more hostile and sadistic. Accepting someone’s negativity gracefully is the first step towards happiness and positivity.


Don’t blame anyone because –

“Good people – give Cheerfulness.

Bad people – give Understanding.

Worst people – give Morals, and

Best people – share Reminiscences.”


In my six-decade journey, I realised that – Through experience, I made ‘good decisions’ and that the knowledge came from ‘bad decisions.’

Just because life can get irrational doesn’t mean you must be unreasonable. You may experience mental chaos and emotional atrocity but still experience inner harmony. Nothing needs to be transformed outside because this serenity and calmness are always present around you.


The Key to Happiness –

“Practice saying NO in the mirror. NO is empowering. NO is not a bad word. NO saves people from peril and exploitation. NO gives self-assurance. NO changes perspective. NO energises love and faith in meaningful relationships.”











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    A very positive approach indeed.

    1. Dr. Anuj says:

      thanks for the positive response 🙂

  2. Dr Ashok Kumar Ojha says:

    The blog “Wanting Positivity is a negative thought-Accepting Negativity is a positive experience” is very well illustrated. It advisable not to be aggressive and violent all the time or raising anger against glaring issues. This at times, may lead into an aggravated situation or prove to be counter productive with out yielding any positive result. The best way is to accept the adverse situation with folded hands and start pondering over it to overcome it. This positive approach will not only enhance morale but may help to find a congenial and favourable solution. If one accepts negativity with both hands, the positive forces start working in perspective and positive results start percolating.. Too good Anuj..

    1. Dr. Anuj says:

      ” If one accepts negativity with both hands, the positive forces start working in perspective, and positive results start percolating” . . . that’s the zest of this blog.
      Thanks for the feedback, bro.

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