Culture,Relationships

GENERATION GAP … A RIDGE TO BRIDGE.

Generation Gap

 

The father used to walk thirty minutes to save Rs.30 – The son spends Rs 30 to save thirty minutes . . . IS THIS A GENERATION GAP?

Was time’s gait so slow and sluggish in the past that things were easy? Did making money and living a stress-free life comfort our forefathers so much that they adored puffs of Hookah sitting in the courtyard gossiping and proving their mammoth fertility by expelling their robust octuple progeny?

My children have tongue-in-cheek reactions when they hear how I led a meagre childhood with a different emotional and financial state of affairs. I am sure they will compare situations in today’s scenario and foster a generation gap.

It is undeniably not a generation gap – it is a gap of varied beliefs and traditions, and ideologies. Don’t you think those who disparage our generation forgot—who raised them? Moreover, it is not due to ignorance – it is due to comfort zones.

The generation gap is a broad ridge that bridges the gap between the two age groups – two philosophies that are both very different in their respective ways.

The principles and sermons that our forefathers laid down are expediently overlooked and rationally annihilated in a contemporary antipathy – we call it the Generation gap.

The truth, however, is that all generations have similar ethics – The expression is somehow different. It is a matter of the youngsters moving forward and the older ones receding into the glorious past.

Whereas previous generations had to face some unpredictability, current generations are facing unprecedented levels of instability.

Generation Gap Example

 

Ironically, each generation imagines itself as more intelligent and rational than the previous one – and wiser than the generation following it. I distinctly remember my father being grumpy behind my back . . . “He thinks himself to be very smart… Do Paise Kee Akal Hai Nahi , Janab ko. . . . Dactar Ban Gaye To Kya Hua . . . etc “

Similarly, I would not hitch in saying –Papa still lives in his old-time he needs to realise that the world has moved far ahead – He needs to understand that our generation is way different from theirs.”

I know people will be shy to endorse, but this is a household story. One generation cursing the other – it is the best pastime for gossip.

When the children talk, the parents call it — ‘talking back’  . . .  Children call it – ‘explaining.’ There is a tussle of ego and understanding.

In most cases, the generation gap nurtures a dismaying breach of communiqué. The children don’t ask their parents for anything – ‘they tell them’. Our parents and grandparents had the audacity and mental egoistical daring to make decisions about our careers and matrimony. Try to do it today – and be prepared to face the music of your grown-up children.

The fascinating aspect of this generation gap fiasco is the – “Leap of affection”. Why are Grandparents more popular and in love with their grandchildren and vice versa? Why does a generation revolt against its fathers and make friends with grandfathers? – I was extremely close to my Late Grandfather. I would sit for hours massaging his feet and listen to his wisdom and sermons carefully without questioning or imposing my half-cooked logic. My becoming a doctor was his order (NOT a suggestion) . . .. Marriage to a non-medico girl was again on his orders. I wonder how and why I blindly followed his orders . . . Things might have been different if my father had levied them. (Anyway, I loved my father too).

I still want to understand the logic and the intricacy of this partiality in which TODAY suffers the brunt and the YESTERDAY becomes besotted with TOMORROW. I feel that a father has a right to LEAD his children. Still, first, he must take lessons to FOLLOW. To get the children’s smiles, the father has to understand the pain and ache of their tears. He has to bridge the past and build an edifice to reach the future, which is key to avoiding a generation gap in the family and linking the communication gap by understanding others’ perspectives.

There has to be an end to the BLAME GAME.

You can call it a change of opinion or the metamorphosis of generations that – an older person looks and adheres to the past – a middle-aged person survives in the present – while a young person looks at the future. There will be day-long debates and symposia to prove or denounce the integrity and emotional veracity of each generation. Still, the fact remains that the Generation Gap creates more unsolved problems with meaningless discussions.

On the lighter side – my grandfather used to remove his hat to show respect – today, my son forcibly and irritably removes his headphones to provide respect. Easy to quote that there is only one thing wrong with this conduct – that many of us do not belong to this younger generation anymore.

High technology, wifi and sci-fi have brought yet another change in social philosophy . . . Our grandfathers talked of a generation gap that stretched to twenty years or more – now it is five to ten years. My daughter talks to her six years younger brother blatantly mentioning a varied ideology – a generation gap.

 

THEY SAY – You, Young People have no sense of culture. You have no respect, no emotions and no depth. Your relationships are frivolous and opportunistic. You talk about your happiness with selfish motives.”

WE SAY – Your culture includes egoism, racism, casteism and religious intolerance – we believe in humanity, love and equality. We believe in facing a little loneliness now rather than a lifetime of loneliness with the wrong person.”

DADA BHAGWAN rightly said . . . “Son or daughter are not yours if you want to go to MOKSHA. If you want to remain in this worldly life, then son and daughter are yours.”

 

And friends – if I could give a gift to the next generation – it would be the capability and courage for each one of them to learn to hoot at himself. This is the best way to bridge the ridge.

EVERY GENERATION NEEDS REGENERATION.

 

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4 Comments

  1. Dr Ashok Kumar Ojha says:

    Generation gap-A ridge to bridge has been explained nicely..Infact, ironically a terse
    word i.e a generation gap tantamounts to lack of cordial communication..Our forefathers dealt a desciplined life and wanted us to be moulded in the same frame..What ever instructions or I would say sermons were passed on by our fathers , that used to be religiously followed in letter and spirit.No reasoning or discussion would ever come. My favourite subject was biology and may be that an iota of feeling would have been at back of my mind to become a doctor.. Destiny was something different in the store..I had to take on the instructions of my father and in some way he was correct also to go for MSc in Organic chemistry and then did PhD also..Once I said that my interest is in biology but it was in vain.Nowadays, situation is different.Our children take their own decision and do whatever they feel like.Though I continued legacy of my father and wanted safe heaven for children..And they did also..My elder daughter wanted to pursue Journalism after 12th std.and younger one younger wanted to pursue fine arts..Elder daughter did Engg and MBA and is holding a senior position in a private sector and younger one is a senior product designer..The decision I still regret…But we have to respect decision of our next generation and support them accordingly…Instead of creating a ridge we should embark on to develop a bridge with our new generation..Since their exposure to the upcoming environment and technology is immense, their adaptability is very smooth..Nice blog Anuj..

    1. Dr. Anuj says:

      Thanks a ton, Ashok Bhai for putting up your thoughts so frankly and beautifully. I also did not force my children to follow Medicine. My daughter became a Designer and is now a brand in Origami. My son became an engineer and is now doing well in his startup. I have no regrets whatsoever. I am happy that I did not enforce myself on my children. They are happy, so I am. I have tried my best to bridge the ridge.
      regards.

  2. Asha kumar rastogi says:

    Very apt indeed.

    1. Dr. Anuj says:

      thanks a lot

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